Should I light the unity candle at my daughter's non-denominational wedding?
The short answer
Decline. As former Catholics, your daughter and her fiancé are almost certainly still bound to Catholic form, so their marriage will be invalid. There is no official teaching on unity candles, but lighting it would signal approval and risk scandal.
Probably invalid
As former Catholics, your daughter and her fiancé are almost certainly still bound to the Catholic form of marriage, so a wedding in a non-Catholic church will be invalid.
The wrong message
There is no official teaching on this, but lighting the candle would signal tacit approval of a marriage the Church does not recognize and carries great potential for scandal.
Scandal
Scandal is an attitude or behavior that leads another to do evil; the one who gives it becomes his neighbor's tempter, and it is grave if it deliberately leads another into grave offense (CCC 2284).
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